General magnetises entire army

Surprising many and confusing a few, Freeguild general Reginald the Oblique has made the decision to install magnets in the shoes of all the soldiers under his command.

Reginald has described the move as a ‘cutting-edge method to increase the stability of [his] regiments during mobilisation’. The Azyr Weekly has received copies of requisition orders not only requesting large quantities of magnets, but large sheets of metal as well. Some commentators speculate that the two may be combined as a sort of makeshift deployment device, though its utility has yet to be proven.

The Azyr High Council was willing to let this slide, but has deployed agents to prevent Reginald removing and magnetising his troops’ arms and heads, in order to achieve increased versatility on the battlefield. Brought before the courts Reginald has been forced to admit that he doesn’t actually know how magnets work, and has pledged to stop drilling into his soldiers’ torsos immediately. 

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