Over the past few years ‘recreational wars’ have become a popular event in the Mortal Realms, with many generals dedicating days of their spare time fighting battles against rival commanders. Although many fight these wars for prestige and honour, a local general has managed to chain together five defeats over a single weekend. They had this to say:
‘Obviously it’s not the result I wanted; no one goes into these things expecting to lose every battle. But I gained a lot of important lessons, learnt some dos and don’ts, and met some great generals while I was there.’
The Azyr Weekly’s investigations have found that a surprising number of generals do not enter these wars with the intention of winning, but instead aim to claim a number of different prizes. Some encourage their soldiers to keep their uniforms spick and span to be acknowledged as being the best dressed, while some others are focused on getting along with their adversaries so as to be known as the ‘Favourite Opponent’. There are some reports of an even rarer class of general who spend hours locked in studies and libraries, formulating elaborate narratives for their armies so that they might go down in the history books.
Despite their horrendous weekend, our local general still intends to compete in future wars. When asked about the all the individuals who will likely die fighting their doomed battles, as well as their loved ones at home, they were dismissive.
‘You never know. The Meta might be kind to me next time.’
The Priesthood of Meta were not available for comment.
The Azyr Weekly 