Fyreslayers spend trouser budget on ur-gold, again

Frustration in Azyr today as Fyreslayer lodges of all stripes continue to plough money into buying ur-gold runes instead of necessities like clothes.

This marks the sixth year of continued mismanagement by the Fyreslayers, with financial aid provided by the Alliance of Order continuing to be squandered. There are now talks from some, most prominently from the Kharadron Overlords, of stepping in and fixing things forcefully. The idea is unpopular, and faced backlash from those who want to dig deeper into the issue.

“The question we need to be asking ourselves is, why?” insists Huwic Sparksmother, a Fyreslayer expert. “We can assume that on some level Fyreslayers do want to wear clothes and interact with society, but they don’t follow through. We need to be honest and admit that until we help them overcome their ur-gold addiction, this is going to continue to be a vicious cycle.”

It appears so far that nobody has asked the Fyreslayers what they want. Our reporter visited a series of magmaholds and found the residents unconcerned about the withdrawal of financial aid. Many were sceptical about the motivations involved, pointing out that the Kharadron Overlords collectively control around 40% of the Realms’ clothing market and would make a tidy profit if the Fyreslayers changed their ways.

“They can keep their filthy rags, my runes keep me warm well enough,” said one Fyreslayer. “And if they can’t stand the sight of some well-crafted glutes, then that’s their loss.”

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