Depravity has lost its edge – Slaaneshi cultist

After years of endless hedonism and perversion, Slaanesh-worshippers awoke this morning to find that depravity simply isn’t what it used to be.

‘Yesterday it didn’t take much at all,’ confirmed local cultist Kerr Sharpsong. ‘A simple poke in the eye would do it. But now it seems like we need to put in twice as much effort for the same result, if not more!’

The same effect has been reported by cultists and daemons across all the Realms. 

Some experts on hedonism have hypothesised that this is the end result of a natural process, a ‘hedonistic treadmill’, where acts will naturally give less pleasure the longer they are performed. But many others, including local priest Jen Bohnson, are claiming it as divine judgement for Slaanesh’s previous excesses. When our reporter asked Sharpsong whether they agreed with this claim they received a poke in the eye.

Whatever the reason, we remind our readers that the followers of Slaanesh are still dangerous and should be approached with caution. Anyone wearing bright colours, outrageous hair, or interesting body piercings should be avoided and reported to your local Order immediately.

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