Nurgle restructures, decimates own armies

Nurgle has struck at the established wisdom of the Realms’ strategists this past week as it becomes clear that his armies will be significantly reduced in size, alongside a general reorganisation of his forces.

Commentators have proposed that Nurgle is working towards a more focused and elite composition in his warbands, a sharp move away from the hordes of Blightkings seen in previous battles. This has surprised some, particularly those who predicted that arms manufacturers would push for larger army sizes to increase their profits.

Not all are happy with the changes. The Glottkin in particular have vented their concerns, reflecting a fear that their sheer size will prevent their deployment in future battles regardless of their battlefield expertise. Calls for the guidelines to be revised are already being heard in Nurgle’s Garden, despite the fact that they have yet to be released.

Bilepiper branches into daemonic mainstream

Breaking news from our music correspondents as we can exclusively reveal that Gloptrop of the Bloatful Tunes, Realms-famous Bilepiper, has dropped his contract with Nurgle and started his transition into becoming a conventional artist.

“It was a definite risk, for sure,” Gloptrop told our reporters. “But I was dying to express my own truth, not just the Grandfather’s, you know? You can only blast dirges to Plaguebearers for so long until you lose your sense of purpose.”

Rumours have it that the musician has been sighted at the famous Bone Abbey recording studio in Shyish, though the Ossiarch Tunekeepers that staff the facility have remained tight lipped. Gloptrop’s publicist has described the upcoming album as ‘an exploration of life-after-plague, delving into the full spectrum of daemonic emotion’. Glotrop’s traditional gutpipes will be joined with Khornate blooddrums, a Slaaneshi screamharp, and an arcane Tzeentchian instrument known as a Moog synthesiser (named for a particularly musical Lord of Change, R’birt Moog).

Innocent but smelly individual conscripted into Blightking ranks

Humiliation amongst the Blightkings today as it is revealed that Sumpson Rottoe is not a sworn worshiper of the Plague God, but instead a particularly odorous individual who got press-ganged by accident.

“I was just sitting outside my farm house playing a game of Battlesword when they came,” Rottoe confided exclusively to the Azyr Weekly from a safe distance. “A column of the fellows came marching up, gave me a sniff, and started burbling at me. I didn’t know what was going on, so I just nodded and grunted back. Next thing I know they were tossing me spare bits of armour and pulling me into line with them. It was all downhill from there really.”

This is not an uncommon experience amongst the Plague Legions, according to experts, with many worshippers rendered blind by disease or particularly aggressive flies. For individuals not wishing to be conscripted into the Bubonic Battalions, the Order of Azyr recommends regular bathing and the wearing of anti-odour liquids purchasable from your local apothecary.