Eternus pursued by Sigmarite copyright lawyers

Eternus – Blade of the First Prince, Champion of Black Lightning, Intellectual Property Thief? That is the accusation being leveled at the dark despoiler by the Knights-Solicitor of Sigmar.

The Sigmarite lawyers have lodged a lengthy complaint in the Azyr Tribunal listing the many aspect of Eternus’ character and bearing that bear a striking resemblance to Sigmar’s own Stormcast Eternals. From oversized pauldrons and his storm-themed reincarnation, to his distinctive pose on the battlefield, almost every inch of Eternus has been labelled an illegal imitation.

Be’lakor himself, Eternus’ patron, has refused to entertain these allegations. He instead insists that any similarities fall under fair use as satirising aspects of the Stormcast Eternals and their allies. Our analysts have suggested that this may have been part of the Dark Master’s schemes all along, a plot to position Be’lakor as the peoples’ champion against an overbearing Sigmar. Whether he is able to harness this energy to propel his own original works, or will simply continue to imitate others, remains to be seen.

Ironclad flees airborne Stonehorn

Terror and fear in the skies above tonight as the Iron Profit, an Arkanaut Ironclad of the Barak-Nar skyport, makes full speed ahead to escape the charge of a maraudering, and unfortunately flying, Stonehorn.

We publish our story on the second day of the Profit’s escape, our news gyrocopter barely keeping pace with the frantic flight. Using an enchanted loud speaker we asked the captain and crew for any comment they wanted to provide, but received only panicked shouts and curses in response.

According to experts on the ground, there are few options available for the fleeing Ironclad. The most popular, though least likely to work, relies on the vessel still maintaining stocks of the previously standard-issue Warp-Lightning-Vortex-in-a-Bottle. Older models grounded their victims when deployed, an ability which could very well save the Iron Profit’s hull today. If the vessel is unable to find such a device, then its options narrow to blasting the Stonehorn out of the sky (which would require a severely unprofitable expenditure of ammunition), or simply hoping that the beast gets bored and stops. Given the notoriously rock-hard brains of the beasts, this last option seems unlikely.

New generation of Chaos Warrior outclasses old with improved armour, poses

Angst amongst the Slaves to Darkness this week as the dark hordes prepare to welcome a new generation of stronger, meaner, and flashier Warriors.

“Used to be all you needed was a suit of armour and a sharp sword,” said Gornar Goodchewer, Chaos Warrior. “Now they’re turning up with glowing runes, chiselled jaws, and dynamic stances. Posers…”

This new generation of hellish infantry has reportedly delighted Archaon, who has broadened the initiative to include the Chaos Chosen, Chaos Knights, and assorted heroes. Chaos Marauders have been forbidden from joining the project, supposedly due to the pleasure Archaon feels watching them struggle under their unlikely physique.